A Lot of Hot Air

A man in a hot air balloon realized he was lost. He reduced altitude and spotted a woman below. He descended a bit more and shouted, "Excuse me, can you help me? I promised a friend I would meet him an hour ago, but I don't know where I am."

The woman below replied, "You're in a hot air balloon hovering approximately 30 feet above the ground. You're between 40 and 41 degrees north latitude and between 59 and 60 degrees west longitude."

"You must be an engineer," said the balloonist.

"I am," replied the woman, "How did you know?"

"Well," answered the balloonist, "everything you told me is, technically correct, but I've no idea what to make of your information, and the fact is I'm still lost. Frankly, you've not been much help at all. If anything, you've delayed my trip."

The woman below responded, "You must be in Management."

"I am," replied the balloonist, "but how did you know?"

"Well," said the woman, "you don't know where you are or where you're going. You have risen to where you are due to a large quantity of hot air. You made a promise, which you've no idea how to keep, and you expect people beneath you to solve your problems. The fact is you are in exactly the same position you were in before we met, but now, somehow, it's my fault."

Why People Are Afraid of Indians

This came as an email from one of my mba mates.. who usually sends very good jokes & this one is very hilarious.. :)) Hope you enjoy it...

Here is a 'true' story about a Indian boy on his first day at school in the USA .

It was the first day of school and a new student named Chandrashekhar Subramanyam entered the fourth grade. The teacher said, "Let's begin by reviewing some American History. Who said "Give me Liberty , or give me Death"? She saw a sea of blank faces, except for Chandrashekhar, who had his hand-up: "Patrick Henry, 1775" he said. "Very good!"

Who said "Government of the People, by the People, for the People, shall not perish from the Earth?" Again, no response except from Chandrashekhar. "Abraham Lincoln, 1863" said Chandrashekhar.

The teacher snapped at the class, "Class, you should be ashamed. Chandrashekhar, who is new to our country, knows more about its history than you do."

She heard a loud whisper: "F**k the Indians,". "Who said that?" she demanded.
Chandrashekhar put his hand up. "General Custer, 1862."

At that point, a student in the back said, "I'm gonna puke."The teacher glares around and asks "All right! Now,who said that?" Again, Chandrashekhar says, " George Bush to the Japanese Prime Minister, 1991."

Now furious, another student yells, "Oh yeah? S*ck this! "Chandrashekhar jumps out of his chair waving his hand and shouts to the teacher, " Bill Clinton, to Monica Lewinsky, 1997!"

Now with almost a mob hysteria someone said "You little shit. If you say anything more, I'll kill you." Chandrashekhar frantically yells at the top of his voice, "Gary Condit to Chandra Levy, 2001."

The teacher fainted. And as the class gathered around the teacher on the floor, someone said, "Oh shit, we're f**ked! "And Chandrashekhar said quietly, "George Bush, Iraq , 2005."

Kiwifruit.....

This is a lovely & valuable article I got today in my email subsciption from their website Realage : http://www.realage.com/ I think this is a very good website for just getting an update about health & living. This website was recommended to me by Neelum - who knows what's best for me.. She got this info from Oprah's show which is one of our favorite shows & everyone knows this is amongst the popular shows in the world. ok going back to what this article about.. well it is about a little green fruit with fuzzy brown skin which would help your heart big time!!!!

Here is what realage & Dr. Oz & Dr. Rozien have to say about this Fruit & how it can benefit us. Eating lots of kiwifruit is like putting a tag team of heart helpers on your cardio-health case. Here's why. It's in Your BloodKiwifruit appear to put the kibosh on artery-clogging plaques in two ways: They help lower triglyceride levels, and they reduce platelet clumping. The platelet effect could be particularly good for your ticker: Although platelets aid in blood clotting, when these cells stick together too much, it could set the stage for a heart attack or stroke.

Head of the Class

There's plenty of heart-helping nutrition in kiwifruit to explain these positive impacts. You may be surprised to learn a kiwi has more vitamin C than an orange, beats bananas for potassium, and is chock-full of vitamin E and magnesium.

Dive In

Kiwifruit are easy to eat. Just slice one in half and scoop out the insides with a spoon, like you would a melon. You can also peel the skin off & cut the whole fruit into slices & you could have them put on a plate & have it with fork or fruit picks. Alternatively one can make Kiwi juice & have a glassful.

RealAge Benefit:

Eating 5 servings of fruit a day can make your RealAge 1.4 years younger.

I am sure one cannot dive into eating 5 servings of fruit immediately.. but having a few servings every week, should also be a good start. I started eating this fruit when I came to Singapore. It was the first time I got to know about this fruit & when I saw this fruit nicely cut & arranged in a stick like kebabs at a fruit stall I fell for it... & i love having this fruit...from then on...

Hope you too enjoy it.. well if not for liking, I am sure who would not like to reduce their age not just by words but physically as well.. Happy Kiwingggggg!!!